| Home | Archived Issues | Contact Us | Subscribe | Donegal Town |

March 26th 2003

| Front Page | Jaundiced Eye | Sport | Other Stories |

....Pontius Pilate alive and well … in Ireland ….

“THE FUTURE WILL BE BETTER TOMORROW” these are the words of George W. Bush………Let’s hope that George Dubya is correct and that the people of Iraq who are being blasted to Kingdom Come today, with the help of the Irish Government, are listening to him………..and take some consolation from his words - that is, of course, those of them who might have a tomorrow….

“IF WE DON’T SUCCEED, WE RUN THE RISK OF FAILURE” another wise saying from George Dubya – does this mean if he doesn’t succeed in annihilating Saddam Hussein, he will have failed? Like his father? And what about Afghanistan? Did he succeed? Or did he fail? Afghanastani people certainly lost…..

“I HAVE MADE GOOD JUDGMENTS IN THE PAST. I HAVE MADE GOOD JUDGMENTS IN THE FUTURE”….I look forward to hearing what his good judgments were in the future.

“WE ARE READY FOR ANY UNFORESEEN EVENT THAT MAY OR MAY NOT OCCUR” Thank you, Georgie, that is very comforting….is that how you won the Election in Florida? Being prepared with a little help from your friends and relations? You were certainly ready to eliminate Iraq ....

The above are just a few quotations from our New World Leader whose position was ratifed for us in Dail Eireann this week. Pontius Pilate was alive and well and speaking in Dail Eireann on our behalf in the guise of members of Fianna Fail and the Progressive Democrats. It was rumoured that Mary Harney was seen to smile once as she eulogised our relationship with America! This rumour that she may have smiled shows what an emotional moment she experienced as she stated “these are our close friends who have helped us work for peace over terrorism in our own country. We accept their honesty. We trust them as friends. We appreciate their help in so many ways…. We want and need the continual engagement of the US and British Governments on our vital national interest”…Good girl, Mary! “Our history, our relationships and our interests with the US and Britain are ours uniquely. Our ties with them run deep: historically, culturally, socially and economically.”
There you are, now - Mary has put us right, revised our history – forget about Lynch making deals with Heath about not interfering with British spies in the Republic in the 70s – we just don’t understand. All those hundreds of years the British were being so good to us and, in the words of the old song….” she came as a mother to her child, and gently raised us from the slime, kept our hands from petty crime… now we are neat and clean and civilised won’t Mother England be surprised”.

How could we Irish people have been so wrong? Perhaps it is our Education system? We never had an Education Minister tell us, as Georgie Boy did “WE’RE GOING TO HAVE THE BEST EDUCATED AMERICAN PEOPLE IN THE WORLD”.

And what did Pontius Pilate/Bertie say in the Dail this week that made us so proud as he washed his and our hands of responsibility for the blood of Iraqi people? Bertie says we are still neutral and the United States and Britain were Ireland’s partners in the Northern peace process, working with us to bring peace to our island. (Perhaps that’s why it took over thirty years this time round?)
• They are our biggest trading partners.
• They are the biggest foreign investors in the Irish economy.
• They are host (?) to the biggest Irish communities (emigrants) overseas.
• They share many of our political and civic values

Because of all the above, Bertie tells us “they are particularly worthy of our understanding where such understanding is appropriate”
So let’s have a look at just a few of the U.S. Values …..
• No. 1 in hazardous waste production
• No. 1 in oil consumption
• No. 1 in natural gas consumption
• No. 1 carbon dioxide emissions
• No. 1 in military spending
• No. 1 in the number of International Human Rights Treaties NOT SIGNED
• No. 1 in the number of known executions of child offenders
• No. 1 in the likelihood of children under the age of 15 commiting suicide with a gun.

Aren’t we here in Ireland lucky to have a Government who recognises the superiority of the United States and Britain as World Leaders and, indeed, as our Leaders? Not misguided like the French and the Germans. We know on which side our bread is buttered – and its not the European side right now. We have known for some time that we were a satellite of the U.S. but now it is official and we can all heave a sigh of relief. Ignore those people who are calling for an end to the war on Iraq, they just don’t know what they are talking about…….the war is not about oil. The war in Afghanistan was not about oil either, and those people who said it was all about a pipeline across the country to bring oil to the West! That was not why an Oil Consultant was put in as Interim Leader by the U.S. after the War… was quite a few months later that the Pipeline deal was signed and work started. It was just those paranoid peaceniks trying to sully the name of the U.S. and question their principles and motives. And they are doing the same again now, saying that Iraqi oil is one of the reasons for this War! And what about that coup in Venezuela, when the oil tycoons ousted the democratically elected President after a quick trip to Washington? And Colin Powell got egg on his face as he gave a press conference saying democracy was returned to Venezuela? Poor Colin Powell, he wasn’t to know the coup would only last 36 hours thanks to all those peasants who thought they had a right to democracy . The truth was out, thanks to an Irish tv crew and that documentary.

And what about the other major figures we have aligned ourself with? Dick Cheney? He voted against a House resolution calling for the release of Nelson Mandela, against the Equal Rights Amendment, against funding the Head Start (education) programme. Dick goes back a long way, he served with that other Great Brain and Humanitarian, Don Rumsfeld, under Nixon - Bush has been bringing all Nixon’s old comrades back in from the cold - charitable man that he is - Rumsfeld is very good for the U.S. economy/armaments industry. He has always opposed arms control and enabled the armaments industry to thrive – think of all the jobs the war on Iraq will provide and secure in the Homeland as the arms and bombs are used up and have to be replaced?

And now our principled Neutral Deputy Leaders in Fianna Fail and Progressive Democrats will join in a prayer with the rest of us for the thousands of Iraqi adults and children, and the soldiers of the Great Powers, who have lost their lives for George Dubya Bush, the Great Leader of the Free World……

The Donegal Times, The Diamond, Donegal Town, Ireland

Tel: +353-73-22860 Fax: +353-73-22937